Chapter Nine

Chapter nine talks about the start of the 2003 major-league spring training and how Josh was still a mess from drugs. At the beginning of the season, the Rays made a big move by bringing long-time major-league manager Lou Piniella out of retirement to manage the team. In the beginning of the season, Josh and Piniella often got into arguments because Josh was often late for spring training after long nights of drug use. Another problem Josh had was that he started to become paranoid that someone might catch on to his secret. He was worried that someone might go through his things and discover his cocaine. He often tried to avoid people including his teammates. All of this affected his ability to play.

He also couldn't hide the side effects of his drug use. One of these were that he would often become sick. The Devil Rays knew that Josh was having problems so they started to put some rules into place. One of the rules was that he could not cross the bridge from Tampa to Bradenton. This being because most of his problems occurred in Bradenton. However, one day during spring training, Josh went to Bradenton and didn't come back. He stayed there for four days. On the end of the fourth day, Josh called the general manager, Chuck Lamar. Lamar knew Josh was having problems so he came up with a plan to give Josh a ten day leave of absence. This was so that Josh could rest and get refocused. Still even on the leave of absence, Josh continued to use drugs. After his leave of absence, he was sent to Double A in Orlando. However, things continued to get worse and Josh's big league career was spiraling downhill. At this point, Josh had lost interest in baseball and he began to wonder even if he wanted to play anymore.